"We have been called to heal wounds, to unite what has fallen apart and to bring home those who have lost their way."
-St. Francis of Assisi
At some point in your life, you have experienced hard times…everyone has. You
have stumbled, messed up, forgotten your way and lost your balance. Even the best of us make mistakes and no one is exempt from suffering. Perfection is not a realistic thing to look for in this life…you absolutely will not find it. Things happen… we are human. It is important to remember this when dealing with your own mistakes and especially with the mistakes of others. But more often than not, we end up beating ourselves up, over and over again because of a small mistake. Who exactly is that helping? It is certainly not helping you remedy the wrong and getting stuck in the swallows of self-blame and self-pity are so counterproductive. It’s like you are swimming against your own waves and you’re just making the mistake even bigger than it was. You must practice compassion, patience and kindness with yourself in order to right the wrong and move forward. Don’t make things worse than they are and don’t let a little mistake stop you from growing and reaching for new heights. Use all of your energy to better yourself… to build yourself up and to do great things, going forward. Your wounds won’t heal if you keep picking at them. Whatever happened, happened…just let it be. Forgive yourself and put the pieces back together again. You will become stronger and smarter from these lessons. That is why mistakes are made… we only learn from experiences.
The same principle applies when dealing with other people because ALL of us are imperfect and likely to err. Yet we continue to expect perfection from people and it’s so easy for us to almost automatically cast blame onto them and become disappointed. However, you must remember that they are still learning too. They are still on their journey and making mistakes is part of the game; it’s how we all learn our lessons. You mustn’t take it personally or make them out to be a bad person for it. Remember, almost nothing that anyone does is because of you, personally… people do things for their own reasons and their actions are based in their own perception of reality. To expect perfection from people sets everyone up for failure. It’s important to be patient and kind, loving and supportive and most importantly; Keep the lines of communication open. If you ostracize them and silently judge them for their mistakes, you are not helping them, you’re hurting them. It’s like you’re watering a plant with poison and expecting it to flourish but it won’t… it will die. For something to grow strong, it must be watered with the right nutrients; it must be watered with Love, encouragement, compassion, honesty and patience and it must be talked to with kindness. Throwing more negativity onto the problem makes it much worse than it was to begin with and prevents any growth from taking place. The goal should be to HELP others, not to hurt them… If you know better, show better… Be an example for them and don’t discourage their progress. Harping on someone’s mistakes does not allow them to move past it, it only forces them to remain stuck in the lower realm of themselves. As Jesus said, “Forgive them for they know not what they do.” What an enlightened statement… people really don’t know what they’re doing, which means that they need compassion and forgiveness more than ever! Be the reason that someone’s wounds heal… help to unite the scattered aspects of themselves and show them the way home. Be the Light in the situation, otherwise you are only contributing to the darkness.